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Gift shopping is never a problem when you're a bear. Our
pals at animal-protection advocates Brown Bear Resources have
come out with a gift so growlingly sensual, the mere sound of
its name gives me major wood: Brown Bear Fudge. Knowing how
much that cubs and bears and otters everywhere love to wolf
down the rich dark sweet stuff, it should fly off this most
excellent charitable foundation's shelves. This delicious,
insulin-inducing fudge is handmade right in the Brown Bear
store by genuine shirtless Montana mount'n men. OK, so maybe
I made up the mount'n men part, but you know this fudge has
gotta be the real deal.
What's SpunkDaddy's pick of their twelve decadent and thrilling
flavors? Five thick pounds of "Cheesecake peanut-butter chocolate,"
please Sir. The chunkier, the better, mm-hmm. And at a mere
$8.99 per pound, you can bust your gut without busting your
wallet. Take it from a Brown Bear Fudge packer. Get it at
http://www.brownbear.org/Giftshop/giftshop4.htm
and tell 'em Bear Stew sent ya.
* * *
Just back from another furr-bulous Summer Bear Week (SBW) in
Provincetown, which was graced all week by the Most Excellent
Mr Intl Grizzly 2004 Jay Duckworth from NYC MetroBears. Jay's
a magnificent bull of a bear: a real sidewalk crowder, and
the kind of nice handsome guy you naturally hope will squeeze
up against you on the narrow sidewalks of the gay resort at
the tip of nearby Cape Cod. Jay entered as my reading of the
Kink fiction anthology and the new bearsmut anthology Bear Lust
got underway. Jay took the last chair in the gallery and
seated latecoming cubs on his lap - there was room for four or more.
The Lit-Bear-ary event was held at the charming Art @ Home Gallery
of main Ptown Bears organizer John Burrows.
The gallery, a perfectly
arranged Cape Cod artspace for tiles, ceramics, and framed art,
is located just up the block from the famed men's bar A-House,
where your SpunkDaddy's been hunting bears since he lived in
Ptown during the tumultuous winter and spring of 1986. A nearby
bear-owned B&B, Captain's House, opened this year, in addition
to a handful of existing bear-friendly guest houses, Bear's Den,
Grand View, and Watership.
At the climax of the hot and steamy SBW Fireman's Ball uniform
benefit, I flashdanced with Mr Intl Cub 2002, Steve Jensen.
Upwards of 1200 ursine guys from everywhere (special woofs to
Phil & Larry from San Diego!) attended the weeklong event, which
doubled the amount of money previously raised for the local fire
department for this event. Record numbers were also reported
for the overlapping Lazy Bear Week in the rustic town of
Guerneville in the Russian River area.
* * *
If you take US Route 6 out of Ptown for about 2.5 hours,
you come to Providence, Rhode Island, "the other P-City" as I
call it. Providence is another bear-friendly small city where bears
and leathermen are warmly welcomed into the community on all
levels. We have two leather/bear bars and two bathhouses, one
of which features regular "Bears at the Baths." Providence
also is the only state capital with a gay mayor, the
diminutive fireplug David Cicilline, who spoke last year
at a benefit during the Mr RI Bear Contest and who is
himself kind of a cleanshaven musclecub (half-Jewish,
half-Italian - ya know he's gotta be hairy).
Providence is also filled with a delectable variety of
ethnic American working-class guys. Sometimes there's
better eye candy at the local diner than you find on
these pages (hard to believe, but true). Take Bobby and
Paul, the two 40-ish owners of the "New York System"
breakfast and wiener grill in my neighborhood. The first
time I walked in there, I thought I'd walked into Hairy-Guy
Heaven, seeing the two of them together behind the counter.
Bobby's Italian, scruffy with a trim black beard and hairy
knuckles. I was just recovering from my first double-take
when Bobby introduced his "partner," Paul, a classic Irish
redbear with a full beard, a gut twice as big as Bobby's,
and muscled, thick-furred forearms. Wearing matching wedding
bands. So unself-conscious, so hetero-manly, so homo-innocent,
so beard-ream-able. The thought of them cooking me up in
a grilled c(l)ub sandwich between them fueled dozens of
post-breakfast-omelette fantasies. For a while, I considered
dropping a hint: "Oh, me? I'm just a friendly, furry bi guy
looking for new pals in town" - but doubtlessly they knew
the score. Both woofters act so damned friendly to me, it's
maddening. Early on, every time I ate there, Paul would wink
at me with that melting Irish grin at least once. I had to
hide my excitement watching them work the grill together
under the menu! But eventually I got around to asking about
their home life, and it turns out they're each with wife
and kids. Family guys, yeah, just business partners. But
apparently not at all beyond having a mild flirtation with
another guy. Don't they know it's unfair to tease the bears?
This column first appeared in American Bear magazine #63, Oct/Nov 2004.
Copyright © 2004 by Ron Suresha. All rights reserved.
Send hot hirsute news to:
bearstuff@suresha.com
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